When the topic of pretty privilege comes up, people are always astounded by the lengths others, who do not possess it, are willing to go to to obtain it. Never mind that studies have literally shown the numerous benefits of being deemed beautiful: better chances of being hired, more prospects of being promoted, being perceived as more intelligent and having more valuable things to say, and of course the obvious, better dating prospects. No, we are still shocked by how people undergo drastic weight loss, skin bleaching, and even surgery.
Despite the very obvious leg up being attractive gives you…
“Umm God, who said we were your toughest soldiers?” wrote my friend in our group chat as we all half laughed, half cried.
The thing with being a tough cookie or ‘strong’ as many people like to say is that eventually, it gets to be too much. At some point, you just want to fucking chill, enjoy some ease and stop feeling like you’re in a never-ending game of Temple Run.
When you are always on, and in crisis-aversion mode, it’s understandable that when things are going well, you start to become a little (read very) suspicious.
Be it patiently…
Online dating is hellish.
Each time I go on the apps, I leave feeling more discouraged than when I arrived.
One redeeming feature though? You run across some funny people. They’re not always a ha-ha type of funny, but they’re sure to make you raise your eyebrows or just look up and ask God what is going on down here.
If you’re still trying to navigate the Hinge’s and Bumble’s, let me warn you of ten types of men you might encounter:
The love bomber. Is already calling you love, baby and boo five minutes into the conversation. Can not…
When you think of the word “rejection,” what’s the first feeling that comes to mind?
For me, it’s shame, embarrassment, and berating myself.
Am I a touch melodramatic? Perhaps, but I’m just being honest.
“Hi Hephzibah, I’ll pass on this but thank you for reaching out,” wrote the editor in response to my first ever digital pitch.
Gutted, I screenshotted the message and sent it to my friend, typing “lol, at least I tried” in a shallow attempt to mask the hurt I felt. …
It’s been just over a year since I started sharing my writing with anyone other than my professors. As I uploaded my first post to Medium, I was convinced that with consistency and a continued willingness to be vulnerable, I’d have at least a few hundred followers a year on and one of my posts would have gone viral by now.
The reality is that the growth has been non-linear and much slower than anticipated. At the beginning of any endeavor, you’re eager and optimistic and there’s also this huge surge of support because everyone’s so excited for you.
Boundaries are marketed as the feel-good thing of the year and the solution to everything: set boundaries and your life will drastically improve overnight.
The sentiment is both true and untrue.
It’s this weird dichotomy because, in your rational mind, you know you’re doing the right thing and for that reason, things feel good. You are limiting unwanted access to and prioritizing yourself. You’re doing things because you want to and not because you feel obligated to. …
On a rainy Saturday morning, in a desperate and inexplicable need of a good cry, I decided to watch To All The Boys: Always and Forever. It was trending on Netflix and I just knew that Peter and Lara-Jean would give me a dose of some corny, unrealistic and utterly unrelatable love.
As I watched, I couldn’t but help cringe at the soppiness of their relationship. Yet, I can’t lie, my heart thawed a little seeing love in one of its simplest forms: the high school romance.
In between random fits of tears, I (out loud, as one does when…
Like most Twitter users, I originally joined the platform so I could see funny videos live and direct instead of being dm’d them three weeks later on Instagram or six months later on Facebook.
Since the panorama started though, Twitter has become an increased source of frustration.
Perhaps, it’s because we’re all spending more time on the platform.
More time + less going on in our lives = a circus of nonsensical hot takes, keyboard warriors armed and ready for the next thing to be angry about and a host of think pieces being released, like clockwork, at 9 AM…
Blame it on hyperawareness and my slight people-pleasing tendencies, but being a polarizing figure really frightens me.
When I first moved to the UK from Nigeria, my unwillingness to sugarcoat definitely took people aback. If you know any Nigerians, you know they are perpetual givers of unsolicited thoughts, comments, and advice.
I wasn’t quite that bad, but if you asked for my opinion, you were absolutely going to get it.
I didn’t smile when there was nothing to smile about, I didn’t pretend to like people who I didn’t like, and frankly, if I had nothing to say, I knew…
A twenty-something writing about relationships, nuanced Twitter hot takes and the journey to becoming a better you.